Gettin On, Gettin On...

Wow! I didnt realize that I havent posted in 2 days! I guess I've just been really exausted... Let me bring you up to speed with the past couple days:

so I told you how monday was a pretty hard day for me... I was kind of hoping that Tuesday would be better... I woke up, and started my day... Dan had stayed up late, and took some bayer for his back ache that he hurt durning PT, and stayed up until like 4 something in the morning his time, therefore he wanted to sleep all day, and when it was time to talk to me it was either one word or rude answers... I got pretty upset with him, because its getting pretty old... Its not fair that he takes his frustration out on me... so I told him that I look forward to talk to him in the morning, and that i dont appreciate he way hes been acting. then he was supposed to get up and skype with us, but ended up going back to sleep, and then had to get stuff done, so we were pushed off, and didnt get the chance because i had tanning... he got all bummed because we had to go, and couldnt skype... I told him a couple weeks ago that i get frustrated, because he wants me to call him to wake him up in the morning, but then he "snoozes" me like 2-3 times having me call him back in an hour, half hour, or 45min... next thing i know, half the day has gone by, and the things i have to do outside our home, i could have gotten done, but instead i waited around all day for him to get up and around, just to then be pushed of for him to do his duties there because he slept all damn day... he tells me all the time that he wants me to do things for myself, but then when it comes down to it, he gets upset when im doing something for myself, and im not there to talk to him... I dont get it. I told him after he was mean to me in the morning, that i didnt want to talk to him when he first gets up anymore, because its not good conversation... he just sits there and listens, and i frequiently have to ask if he's still there, and if he's listening... its pretty much a one way convorsation... and its really frustrating. then days later i ask him about stuff, and he says "didnt i tell you about that? i thought i did..." He he cant help it, he's grouchy in the morning, especially when someone wakes him up, so i retracted by saying, "so why dont you get yourself up then?!" and he responds by saying "but i like hearing from you first thing when i get up!" ugh!!! this started because i got frustrated with him because he pushes me off and has me call him back 10x so he can go back to sleep (like i said earlier) and then doesnt have time to talk... so NOW, he sits there, and listens to me talk and when I ask for his input hes rude, and then tells me that hes going to go back to sleep for a while and for me to call him back... that was his resolution to the problem... so now instead of getting totally put off, i get the worst of him... great. not to mention that ive been working really hard on the invitations and everything else for our upcoming wedding...

so then yesterdsay, i wake him up, and im in a great mood... same thing... one way convorsation! so i started to get frustrated, and told dan to call me back when he woke up,and he said that he wanted to take to me then... for the past week, hes been bringing his phone to class, and kept saying that he wanted to skype with us yesterday, but slept too late, and missed his window to skype with us,because evan had gone down for his nap... he said we would skype anywy, but didnt bring it up again... i told him over the weekend, that im sick of being the only one who brings up skyping... he says he wants to, but then i have to like remind him or something... its really annoying. plus, when we do skype, he doesnt even look at us, he goes on the internet and looks up other stuff... so whats the point?! I had told him that i told my dad i would go over his house, and regretted it, because i didnt want to go... he said "thems the brakes..." so then when he said how he didnt feel like going to school i said "thems the brakes" right back at him, and he didnt seem to like it very much... I went over my dads, and got major lectures about money, and the cost of things.... my father said that he would give us $7000 toward our wedding, and i added up the total it should cost for the hall, and we should have about $2000 left... so i asked if he would still contribute the rest on other things... he said no. he doesnt want me to get married, so he's making this as hard as he possible can for me. he offered to give us $7000 that he was going to contribute to the wedding if we didnt get married, or atleast didnt have a wedding, and we declined saying we would rather have the wedding, and that s why he says that he wont give us the rest if theres any left over... its not like we're going to put it in the bank, we're going to use it for other things like the limo or the dj or something... since dan had his phone, he texted me saying he hoped i was having fun... i told him how it was pretty much torture, and that i wished i had stayed home... because after he was done yelling and screaming at me about money and how mny servers and bartenders we're going to need for 80 people... he moved on to yelling at me because i didnt ask my loser drug adict sister to be one of my bridesmaids!!! saying that i should put my differences aside and that she's my sister, blah blah blah... im getting so freaking sick of this shit!!! i told dan that i wished we just ran away and got married! he said that itll all be worth it in the end, which i agree with him, but right now it just doesnt seem like it...

so far today has been a little better... he asked me to wake him up at noon (and its only 11:10, so i havent talked ot dan yet, but so far so good, altho evan hasnt been in the greatest mood...)

Dan has seemed very down lately... I'm a little worried about him... I know he's rally home sick,and ready to be home already, but its getting worse by the day... even his mother told me last night that he called her on mothers day and that he did nothing but give her one word answers until she said that she had to go... i know that he also hasnt been getting along with his roommate... which stinks too, but like i said its been getting worse. i wish there was something that i could do... the shad derby is this coming sat, and dan really enoys going... he has to miss it, and i think that really bothers him alt, i wonder if that has anything to do with it... I told him that i would prolly skip it.. that i wasnt sure if i wanted to go or not yet... that i was take or or leave it on the whole thing... so since i dont really feel like going anyway, i think ill just skip it this year, that way he doesnt feel so bad. I think im going to try to talk to him today about whats going on with him. hopefully i can get SOMETHING out of him...

oh well, if theres anyone out there that actually reads this blog... wish me luck... better days are sure to come! (ugh i hate being so negative :( ) 6 wks 1 day until my Airman comes home!